Now, I tell widows to mourn their husbands very well –Evangelist Bola Odeleke

        

Evangelist Bola Odeleke in this interview with GBENRO ADEOYE, speaks on her life as a preacher, her late husband and the mistakes she made after his death

You recently celebrated your 40th anniversary in the ministry, how has the experience been?

Forty years of my ministry have been wonderful and glorious and that is why it was themed ‘Grace made me.’ When I looked at the whole thing, if not for God, where would I be? It is not an easy task for a woman to be in ministry in Africa but God has been helping me since I started in November 1974. God is helping me and the gift of God in me is making way for me.

You’re 64 years old now, so you must have started at a young age.

Yes, I was very young.

Did you think that you would become a preacher as a young girl?

No way. I never thought that I could be a preacher though I was from a Christian home, the Aboderin family. My father who was the first child of the Aboderins was an organist emeritus at the Anglican Church in the old Western Region for 50 years. So everybody in my house could sing. During early morning devotion at 5am, we would sing and as we grew up, we would join the choir at age nine. So I’ve been singing since I was nine years old. All these things are part of us. I grew up with all of that but I never knew it would lead me to becoming a pastor. No, not at all. There was no pastor in the family, though I heard about a woman called Iya Adura, she even died before I was born. So there was no reference point for me even in the family. My father who was an organist was not being paid for it because he was an accountant and he had his job. He was a rich man, one of the first five people to buy a car in Ibadan in those days. His mother was Yejide of the famous Yejide Grammar School, Ibadan. So I come from a rich home and everybody was doing their business. My late husband and I received Christ in 1970; he was a lieutenant at the time. I remember that the prophet that came said ‘madam, you will do the same work I have come to do here.’ I laughed. Immediately he left, I said I didn’t believe him and that he was not a true prophet. Why would he say I would become a prophet. For what? I had two boutiques. I was working at the National Bank then. As I finished secondary school, there was job waiting for me. Then I got married to a military officer and I was okay. So why would I think of becoming a pastor? So we just laughed it off.

How was growing up for you?

I grew up in Ibadan and Ilesha (Osun State). My mother was from Ilesha and my father was from Ibadan. But it was my grandmother, Mama Ilesha, who trained me. That’s why I can speak Ijesha better than Ibadan dialect. I had my primary and secondary school education at Ilesha. I went to Atakumosa High School, Osu (Osun State). I moved to Ibadan when I was about 10 years old. Then, when the first child of the family got married, she would have to go with a little sister called ‘omo eyin iyawo’. So I had to go with my elder sister because she married an Ibadan man. Then another sibling got married and since I was the last child, I was doing ‘omo eyin iyawo’ up and down, so that was how I ended up in Ibadan. Even when I was little, we had to be in my father’s house every Christmas because at St. David’s Church, Kudeti, Ibadan, apart from my father being an organist, there was also a pew for the Aboderin family because my grandfather built the church. But from age 10, my coming to Ibadan became regular till I married an Ibadan man. That was how I ended the Ilesha chapter.

How did your relatives and husband take your decision to become an evangelist?

I was married before I started the ministry, so my family had no say in it. It was my husband that had a say but he didn’t take kindly to it because our marriage was just about five years old. We were at the Christ Apostolic Church at the time and the pastors and the evangelists advised him not to allow his wife to go into it so that people would not take his wife away from him. Therefore, he too had that in his head that he would lose his wife and he didn’t want a divorce because he loved his wife. We grew up together; we were from the same area, the same road. Our houses faced each other at Isale-Ibode, Ibadan so I knew him when I was six and he was eight. We were friends. We had a tap in our compound and they didn’t have in theirs so he would come and get water from my compound. That was how we met. We played with sand together when we were little. We grew up first as friends before we got married. So it was like his friend would be taken away from him. The pastors kicked against it and he too bought the vision of ‘my wife will not do it.’ So he said, ‘well, you said God told you, I believe you. Go and preach once, then after that, you won’t do it again.’ We agreed and I went to preach at Owo (Ondo State) and by the time I returned home, news had reached him of the lame that walked, the blind that saw, the deaf that heard. When I returned home, he said he had heard the story. I showed him some pictures. He said, ‘so you are going to be like Prophets Obadare and Durojaiye.’ I said I didn’t know. So he became interested and suggested that we should pray that God should use somebody else. Both of us agreed not to go into it. So we would kneel down in the morning and pray ‘God, use somebody else.’ He was teaching at the Nigeria Defence Academy at the time. One day as he was resting and taking a nap, he dreamt off. He heard a radio broadcast about a revival at Efon Alaye (Ondo State). It announced the revivalist as Lady Evangelist Bola Odeleke; announcer as Lieutenant Lasun Odeleke. He woke up and found out that he was still in the teachers’ room. So he came home and told me what he heard. He said he even heard a name- Lady evangelist. So that was how I became Lady Evangelist Bola Odeleke. So that settled it for everybody. He realised that his work was to announce his wife and till he died, he occupied that position. He never struggled with me over anything. Even when we started the ministry, Christ Message Ministry, I made him its President and I was Vice President. Anytime we were holding a meeting, he would say ‘don’t mind her, I’m just the president by mouth, she is the main person. What did God say we should do mama?’ He was the perfect husband of a lady minister. He acted that part very well. He helped me with the administration of the ministry and so many things and allowed me to go anywhere that I wanted to go. Even when we were having children, he would take the children from me till I returned and he would be fasting and praying for me.

It appears you were the first popular lady evangelist in the country, how were you received by the public who must have been used to seeing only male evangelists?

There were a lot of discriminations. In fact, some people would ask me; show us a woman that has done this before. So where are you coming from?’ And truly, what God was asking me to do, no woman was doing anything like that. Then the Holy Spirit would jump on them and they would say ‘anyway, we will let you speak for 10 minutes’. They would then give me the microphone. And at that time, I was very tiny. I was just 24 years old. So they would say ‘a little girl came and said God said this and that. I don’t know where she saw God, but she said she saw God. Let’s hear her.’ And as I held the microphone, God would start from the man that wanted to humiliate me and miracle would happen. So it was the gift really that shut the mouths of the people that could have stopped me. And I also heard stories about how a lot of women would have risen in evangelism even before I started, but people stopped them. So that is why I said Grace made me. God allowed me. In spite of all the criticisms, miracles shut their mouths because only fools deny proofs.

How did you become a female bishop with all the discriminations you faced?

I’m the first female bishop in Africa, since May 28, 1995. That again was from the Lord. I had a church in England, so I went there to oversee the church and take some rest. Then my pastor there told me about a group called International Ministerial Council of Great Britain. They were having a convention. It’s a council for all Pentecostal churches in England and Europe and my church was part of it. So he asked me to also attend so I went with them. We were over 2000 pastors in the place and the Head, Archbishop Douglas’ eyes caught me. If I moved this way or that way, he would follow me with his eyes. So I changed my seat. I was wondering if it was because we had arrived late for the event. It was his custom to be at the gate and shake hands with everybody and when it was my turn after the event, he held on to my hand. This is a man that was over 70 years at that time. So he held on to my hand and said, ‘can I know you? I introduced myself as Pastor Bola Odeleke (at the time, I had been ordained pastor). He asked where I came from and I said Nigeria, Africa. He asked if he could have a date with me, that he wanted to see me again. I said ‘it’s okay, sir.’ So he called his secretary to give me his number and the place to meet him. So I asked my pastor what it was about and he said maybe he just wanted to meet me. We then went to Watford. When we got there, we met other bishops waiting for us in his office. I didn’t know it was an interview. So we started talking over tea and biscuits. They were asking me about my ministry, which was about 25 years at the time. I told them what the Lord was doing in Nigeria, the crusades, the miracles, and so on. My mouth was just running and you know I enjoy talking, so I was just talking. So at a time, they looked at one another and said, ‘Praise the Lord, we have found our first female bishop.’ So I started looking around for their female bishop and wondering if anyone came in. But I was the only woman there. Then they said, ‘you are the first female bishop.’ I started laughing. I said I was from Africa where some people were not comfortable with me being a pastor, let alone a bishop. They said they would gazette it in the UK and the entire world would know about it. I said ‘excuse me, if it’s going to happen, you will come to Nigeria because I don’t want any problem. Come to my country and let people see you that you are the ones that chose me.’ They said yes, they would follow me. So that was how they gazetted it and I didn’t pay a dime. They gazetted it in the UK for 90 days and pasted it in all the mainstream churches, Catholic, Anglican, Baptist, The Apostolic, etc. that people should come forward if anyone had anything against it and when nobody was against it for 90 days, they came here. We have a copy of the gazette. The leader of the Methodist Church with the Archbishop came here. Three of them came- an archbishop and two bishops. They came to consecrate me here and I invited a lot of bishops here to witness it. They trained me for three months and I had to attend classes twice a week for three months. Then at least, five churches apart from my own church must write a testimony about me, and I must have at least 15 pastors that submitted to me and must have been in the ministry for at least 15 years. Those were the conditions I had to satisfy before the council could consecrate me. I even surpassed the conditions. They were looking for 15 years in the ministry, mine was more than 20 years old. When the letters recommending me came, they were more than five.

What would you describe as your happiest moment?

My happiest moments come during crusades; that’s my gift. I’m happy when we have crusades. I’m happy seeing crowd, preaching to them and seeing miracles happen. Do you know that the first time a lame boy rose and walked during a crusade, I ran. I dropped the microphone and ran. You know, I thought there was nothing like that. I thought the ones I had seen were stage-managed. I never knew it could be real. So when that boy stood up, I dropped the microphone and ran to the senior pastor and told him that I did not know the boy. I did not arrange it, I kept shouting. And the man was saying this could not have been arranged, we can see it. The boy staggered towards me and said he had never walked in his life. That was how it all started. I remember very well, it happened at Owo in December 1974. I was very immature because I had never seen anything like that.

Looking back again, what has been your saddest moment?

My husband’s death was sad for me, even till now. Although when I talk about it now, I don’t cry again. It’s been 24 years now. A great helper left me. He was the one handling the administration and teaching me things. I had only secondary school certificate, so I had no experience, nothing. But at NDA, he had gone through courses and so was enlightened. He was a commanding officer, he was a brigade commander. He planned the organisation of the ministry very well. Even till now, we are still following the plan he left here. So when he suddenly died, it was my saddest moment. But people didn’t know because I put up a bold face and I took it with faith. So, people didn’t know that something was wrong with me. It’s my saddest moment in life. God has removed that because my children are grown up now. They are working and everybody is okay. Our first child was just 18 years old when my husband died, now she’s 42 years old.

People say his death really affected you to the point where your ministry suffered.

Oh yes, it suffered. It suffered for it. He was my friend, my father and husband.

Could it be that you trusted other men like you trusted your late husband since your subsequent marriages weren’t as pleasant as your first?

That’s exactly what happened. I don’t like talking about it again because it’s in the past. And past is gone. I learnt my lessons and I’m okay now and the Lord is taking care of me. I have a joyous future ahead of me.

We learnt that some people, including some members of your congregation, disapproved of it when you wanted to remarry three years after your husband’s death. Why were people against you remarrying?

Even if it is second year, I don’t understand because a widow has the right to remarry and I was just 40 years old. I look at it as Satan trying to get back at me. This is because when my husband died, my guard was let down a little. When you lose somebody you love, it’s like your head is cut off and you can’t hear or see. You don’t understand anything. And then, there will be so many mistakes. So that was what happened to me. My head was cut off. My husband was my head. Yes, I made some mistakes. I made mistakes at that time and people didn’t understand and everybody was talking and God told me not to talk. So I couldn’t defend myself. There were a lot of lies. I would read newspaper and say ‘Ehn! Ehn! When did I do this one?’ I only prayed that God should defend me and he did. Some people would go through what I went through and you will never hear their names again. So I give God praises. God vindicated me and let people know I didn’t offend him and if I didn’t offend God, who else is there?

Widowers are usually allowed to remarry whenever they want to. Do you think that the society is unfair to widows than widowers?

Nigerians are chauvinists. It’s in our culture that men can do anything they want but women cannot do that. So when a woman wants to do something, they will say women don’t do that. If someone’s wife died, in a few days, they will say if he doesn’t remarry, the dead will be troubling him. But if it’s a woman who lost her husband, they will tell her to wait, that her husband will take care of her from the dead. That is why I forgave everybody for whatever they said, including the press. They didn’t understand. That’s exactly what happened. Some people left the church because of what the press wrote. Journalists did not handle it well. And they didn’t even bother to do any investigation. All the papers that wrote about me at that time, we are all friends now. They have seen the truth.

How has your experience influenced the advice you give to widows?

I advise widows to mourn their husbands very well. Mourn him out of your heart. Mourn him out of your system, out of your life and then you will be able to see who to marry again. If the mourning is not over, you are blind. When they are telling you not to do it, you won’t listen to anybody. You are not hearing. So mourn that person out of your system, especially if you were in love before your spouse died. It applies to a man too. I tell widows that when you have mourned that man enough and you feel you need a companion, go for it. You have the right to do so. If men can remarry, women can do it. Nowadays, it doesn’t take one year for widowers to remarry and nothing is happening. So I tell the woman that because you are a woman and soft, mourn the man out of your system and then go ahead and do what the Lord has asked you to do. If the Lord says you should remain a widow for life, then remain a widow. If he says he will give you another head, why not? So that’s what I teach them. The mourning period will depend on each person. If you can mourn him out in a few days, it’s all right and if it takes another woman 10 years, fine.

So how has it been staying alone since your last marriage?

I’m not alone, alone ke? You can see many people around.

Okay, what about having a companion?

I have a lot of companions. I have seven children and 11 grandchildren now. I have a lot of friends. I have a lot of children in this world so I’m not alone. I have companions. But if God wants me to marry, for all of you to know, it can happen. That is left to him. I’m in God’s hand.

You talk about your husband passionately yet people say military officers are tough. What was it like married to a military officer?

I was married to a child of God. We received Christ at the same time in 1970 when he was commanding officer of a battalion. It was on the same day. I married my best friend plus he was a child of God. He was kind-hearted. He rose to the position of Brigadier-General and they gave him posthumous decoration. His promotion was supposed to come the month he died and they still gave him the rank. I married a complete gentleman.

People used to describe you as fashionable during your programme Agbara kibati on TV. What inspired your dress sense?

Remember that I was into fashion before God called me. I ran two boutiques; I designed clothes for my tailors to sew. So I could turn around any cloth and make it good.

Did any of your children take to evangelism also?

Yes, they are in the ministry doing one thing or the other. All of them are Christians doing one thing or another for the Lord. I have a son that is a full time pastor at one of our branches. I was carrying his pregnancy when God called me, so it’s understandable.

Do you have any regrets in life?

No regrets. I don’t know what work I can do that will make me this famous. I was hitting newspapers’ front pages for six months. Could selling clothes bring such fame? I am happy being a pastor. God answers my prayers and has been very good to me. It’s been 24 years since my husband died and He has single-handedly helped me to train my children. They are all graduates.

                                                                                   

Evangelist Bola Odeleke